Sometimes I feel like a motherless child a long, long way from home. ~Paul Robeson
There are times I feel disconnected from everyone, the odd man out standing in a crowded room watching from an obscure corner as everyone else mingles and, I imagine, connecting at the soul level.
My soul has the ability to thrive connected to itself. This is a reality I learned while living alone for a year and a half in India. It’s both a blessing and a curse. I am very comfortable being alone, on my own. On the other hand, I crave connection with other humans but find myself making excuses to avoid human contact so I can be alone.
Why the dichotomy? Perhaps, I am an introvert. But this makes no sense to me.
I enjoy working with people. I am able to transubstantiate the cacophony of a loud and crowded coffee shop into creative energy. But I also absorb creative energy being alone in a red rock desert, a place I prefer the company of myself, and become distracted to annoyance when any human generated noise invades the earth song.
Am I the proverbial riddle wrapped in a mystery inside an enigma?
Perhaps, I am simply a soul, a confused soul, seeking connection with the world, seeking ways to connect without losing myself.