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Could Have, Should Have, Would Have

An artist is a creator driven by demons. ~William Faulkner

I am haunted by demons. Three demons. The specters of ‘could have’, ‘would have’, and ‘should have’ constantly nip at my heels as I run blindly, wildly on a road to somewhere, to nowhere, to who the hell knows where, does anyone care where.

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Labyrinthian Reading

Life is to short to read a bad book. ~James Joyce

I am in the middle of a book I find a challenge to be fully engaged with and I wonder if I will have the oomph to follow it through to a turn of the final page. Does that make it a bad book? Am I a bad reader? Or are we simply two minds failing to find common ground on which to have meaningful interaction?

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Becoming More Fully Human

He wanted to cry quietly but not for himself: for the words, so beautiful and sad, like music. ~James Joyce

I am not one to cry as a spontaneous response to beauty unless that beauty is a heartfelt reaction to one human going out of their way to be kind to another. Acts of selfless giving, giving of the self, almost always send my heart to tittering and regularly find my eyes expressing heart joy in salty tears.
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Not Half The Man

When one has not had a good father one must create one. ~Freidrich Nietzsche

I have come to the realization, I will never be half the man, half the father my dad was to me, my siblings, the world at large. Besides heart disease, I seem to have inherited few of the essential ingredients making him who he was. My vine crawls a different life path across the crosshatched trellis seeking light.

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Chaos, Not Cleanliness, is Godliness.

One must still have chaos in oneself to be able to give birth to a dancing star. ~Friedrich Nietzsche

Chaos is usually viewed as an enemy to be vanquished, a demon undermining the godly state of precision and order. “Cleanliness is next to godliness”, mom used to say. Feelings of discomfort bubble up when the home is cluttered, when the bed is unmade, when drivers defy the rules of the road and drive the wrong way on a one way to escape chaotic traffic, when the record collection is not sorted by genre then subsorted by artist in ascending order of the group or last name further subsorted by album title in all cases making sure preceding ‘The’s and ‘A’s are ignored.
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Mosaic Man

Only through art can we emerge from ourselves and know what another person sees. ~Marcel Proust

Art is the physical manifestation of our souls spilling into the world, the exposure of our minds, the light and the dark, the good and the evil, on display for inspection, for analysis, for deconstruction and reconstruction into other forms. It celebrates our joys and shares our inner turmoils.
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Tabula Inscripta

If a little dreaming is dangerous, the cure for it is not to dream less but to dream more, dream all the time. ~Marcel Proust

The danger in little dreams is they taunt us into believing they are the ultimate reality when they are merely a stepping stone, or stones, stop gaps to the realization of the BHADs, Big Hairy Audacious Dreams implanted into our souls at conception.
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